The Art of Undivided Attention (10/15/07)

I wrote this over a month ago ... just now getting around to posting it.

On the way home from work today, I was thinking …

Over the weekend a friend and I saw a fantastic movie: “Why Did I Get Married?” I am a big Tyler Perry fan (who wrote, produced and starred in the movie). He is a strong Christian man trying to make it in the insanity of Hollywood – I highly recommend this movie.
But that’s an aside – here is the real topic: The Art of Undivided Attention
There is one scene in the beginning of the movie where the husband and wife are driving to a “vacation” up in the mountains for a week long marriage retreat. They are arguing about how the wife isn’t spending enough time with the husband because her job is so demanding. During this scene, she is constantly checking her BlackBerry. He asks her if she would please mind not doing work during their vacation. Of course, she responds by answering a phone call or an email on her BlackBerry. The husband says something to the affect, “Oh great, a third person to share our vacation.”
So this got me to thinking … in our fast-paced multi-tasking world, have we lost the art of giving another person our undivided attention?
Now, for those of you that have known me for a while know that I am pointing three fingers directly back at myself when I ask this question. I have OFTEN been guilty of carrying on a conversation with a person (either in person or on the phone) while checking my BlackBerry (or whatever the PDA of choice maybe be).
In any relationship, how intrusive would it be to have a third person around at all times with the ability to interrupt at any give moment? Think about it – 10 years ago, that would have been unheard of!
I continue to reflect on this and think of the times when I bring this “art” multi-tasking into my personal life. Multi-tasking when it comes to our jobs, especially, is often a necessity and considered an asset in most careers. However, is it really needed that much in our personal lives? How much did our parents our grandparents multi-task?
Now granted, our grandparents may have been doing chores on the farm and talking to another adult or child – or perhaps, grandma would carry on a conversation with the kids or grandpa while cooking dinner in the kitchen …
But how many of us would find the following scenario commonplace today:
Mom is in the car driving the kids home from school, she is listening to the radio, talking on the cell phone, looking at her GPS for the directions to the new soccer field, getting a text message from her husband and all the while the kids are in the back seat vying for attention? (Oh yea, and possibly even a DVD movie playing in the background … yes, IN THE CAR).
It would be easy to write scenario after scenario of just such relational multi-tasking.
How would you feel if someone actually sat down, looked you in the eye – turned off their cell phone and PDA (the TV, their iPod AND the radio) and gave you their undivided attention? This could be in a marriage, with parent and child, boss and employee, etc. etc.
And even more importantly – how about giving our undivided attention to God?
Certainly has made me think ….